Hola, Sneakers! Welcome to Episode 551 of Sneaky Dragon – the best source of nonsense on the internet.
This week: nap snap; Boone-doggle; interesting death; pee time; Columbo day; film test; eye role; God continuity; justice for monkeys; chokehold skeptic; wamprat academy; shameful part; justice for Tuskans; high tech past; holo promises; rein-car-nation; dirt floor poor; acting characters; Lorne free; comedy team dynamics; walkabout; dreamtime; rent check; against disease; the times they are a-changing us; define yourself; be careful what you work for; no motivation; giant pool; steakburger; “I am a doughnut”; Top 5 Blue Baby Songs; acceptance speech; sweet persuasion; more boobs; toy time; apple jerks; cone heads; children of the porn; youth groups; tag team; cookie monsters; musical mayhem; and, finally, fox paws.
Top 5 Blue Baby Songs
- The Shadows – “(Don’t Make My) Baby Blue” – Columbia Records single b/w “My Grandfather’s Clock”, 1965 – 1:54:53
- Chilliwack – “Baby Blue” – Dreams, Dreams, Dreams, 1977 – 1:59:06
- The Bitter Ind – “Baby Blue” – ACP Records single b/w “Hands Are Only to See”, 1967 – 2:09:36
- The Beach Boys – “Baby Blue” – L.A. (Light Album) – 2:13:42
- Badfinger – “Baby Blue” – Straight Up, 1971 – 2:25:13
Question of the Week (from Louise): What is the worst adaptation of a book or graphic novel?
Sub-question of the Week: Who is someone that has enjoyed a second act in their career?
Once again, congratulations to Regis on his big win!
And let us not forget Jason Van Slyke’s video/puppet tribute to the fabulous Texas psych-rockers The Bubble Puppy. (You know, the usual kind of thing you see.)
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I thought the 1984 De Laurentis/Lynch adaptation of Dune was really bad. Lynch has said he was reined in as a director on the film, but I think I would’ve like it even less if there had been more of Lynch’s sensibility in the film. There is weirdness in the Dune novel, but not the kind of weirdness Lynch’s movies have become known for.
I think Robert Downey Jr. gets the prize for “Most Improved Career” for his comeback after hitting the skids due to substance abuse. Even when he was at his lowest, he must’ve had a certain charm that appealed to producers and directors. They kept giving him chances, which he kept blowing, until he was able to get his addictions under control. Winona Ryder is also having something of a career renaissance thanks to Stranger Things and the Gen X nostalgia boom.
Lynch’s DUNE adaptation was so bad, he had his name taken off the credits of any further versions of the film and replaced with the name Alan Smithee. Alan Smithee is an official pseudonym used by film directors who wish to disown a project and there’s quite a few. It’s a common pseudonym for directors whose film was clearly taken away from her/him and recut heavily against her/his wishes in ways that completely altered the film.
100% agreed with Robert Downey Jr. When I saw he was cast as Tony Stark years ago I thought the films might have gone the way the comics did and tell the story of Stark’s addictions. With that in mind I thought hiring Downey Jr. as Stark was a genius move to use a recovering addict, but the films didn’t take that road. Now, years later, there’s nobody else I could imagine in that role, Downey Jr. owned the hell out of Tony Stark and earned him a well deserved second chance at other roles as well…Sherlock Holmes?
Alan Smithee has a long and undistinguished record in Hollywood, including The ‘ne-plus-ultra’ of such movies: “An Alan Smithee Film: Burn, Hollywood, Burn”. The paradoxical story concerns a director named ‘Alan Smithee’ who wants his name removed from his most recent film. Back in the real world, director Arthur Hiller saw the final cut and hated it, which led to his credit being replaced with ‘Alan Smithee’. Each layer of the story is such a confusing mess that it led to the name being discontinued.
You two and Star Wars…making my head explode but an interesting analysis nonetheless.
It’s funny how the first two adaptations I thought of include Tom Cruise, who is arguably one of the World’s most successful actors, producers, etc. I remember when it was announced that Cruise was taking over the role of Lestat from “Interview with a Vampire” and caused quite a fuss among the devoted Anne Rice readers. I didn’t read Rice’s work but plenty of friends and customers at Lone Star Comics did…and they didn’t hold back. They all wanted someone like Rutger Hauer in the role and not the 5’6″ dark haired Cruise. For the same reasons that “Vampire” had, Cruise was almost immediately shunned from the “Jack Reacher” role as well by faithful readers. Reacher, who is built like a brick shit house in the books was not a compatible match for Cruise but the film continued on. In light of what the readers thought initially, I think both adaptations did fine, Cruise can turn anything into box-office gold and since they’re adaptations and there’s always the chance of seeing a different one down the road. Guess that’s why its called “acting” folks.
I also remember the petition going around to all the comics stores in an effort to remove Michael Keaton from Burton’s Batman in 1989…an actual paper petition! I didn’t sign it, I thought Keaton deserved a chance and I think I won on that deal, he’s still my Batman.
Okay, one more and I can say it in two words, Barb Wire.
Second Act career? Third Act? How about I throw out one of Hollywood’s most active nonagenarians, Mr. William Shatner. Of course he’s Captain James T. Kirk, but the man has refused to be typecast as he re-invents himself. My Mom, who knows nothing about Star Trek, fell in love with Shatner’s Denny Crane character years ago on “Boston Legal” and has been a Shatner fan ever since. I don’t think it even has to do with being super popular or profitable as an actor, but the fact that Shatner just keeps going and going upsets all the odds for an actor his age. I’ve met him numerous times and he does not act his age in person either, he was charming and engaging to everyone in the room. The man just has some unlimited energy, maybe we should pay more attention to it and learn from it.
From “Fight Club”:
(Edward Norton) “If you could fight any celebrity, who would you fight?”
(Brad Pitt) “Alive or dead?”
(Edward Norton) “Doesn’t matter. Who’d be tough?”
(Brad Pitt) “Hemingway. You?”
(Edward Norton) “Shatner. I’d fight William Shatner.”
As I Sneak away now, All Good Things to all my fellow Sneakers!
Hey folks –
Congratulations on number 551 – another step towards that thousandth episode!
Still amazed at how you both stay on such good form week after week.
The two worst movie adaptations are to my mind those that spend a ton of money whilst missing the point, and then replacing the original in the popular consciousness.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen is a fantastic concept which could have either been adapted straight or taken in new directions. Alan Moore’s take on the characters was ignored, as were Kevin O’Neill’s stellar designs. So many stupid decisions, chiefly staging a car chase in the only city on the planet with no roads. Thankfully there’s a new adaptation in the works… we can only hope!
Alice In Wonderland is another miss – I know we keep coming back to it, but it pains me.
There’s a line to be drawn between Absurdity, Nonsense, Silliness, and Trippiness.
Absurd humour is hard to achieve, since it relies on surprise of combining carefully chosen concepts.
To write good nonsense verse we need to understand the rules and how we’re breaking them. Invented words can conjure something in our mind’s eye: Dr. Seuss was a bit lazy in this department, often inventing words to make lines rhyme.
By contrast, silliness and Trippiness are random, incoherent, and annoying.
Which is a fair review of Tim Burton’s film.
On late career resurgence:
A bunch of elderly blues musicians reached a new audience in the ’90s thanks to Fat Possum Records and their refreshing motto ‘Not the Same Old Blues Crap’. I was lucky to see both RL Burnside and ‘T-Model Ford’ a couple of times as they returned to touring in their 70s. Worthy of note is RL Burnside’s album ‘A Ass Pocket of Whiskey’, which was recorded over the course of an afternoon with support from the Jon Spencer Blues Explosion. Each track is fresh as a daisy and raw as a slab of meat. Plus there’s a very entertaining shouting match about shopping for potato chips.
Laters potaters,
Peter Peter potato eater.
Sylvester Sallone’s “Judge Dredd” was pretty awful. The more recent adaptation, “Dredd,” is a much better movie.
Late career resurgence: Coincidentally, Sylvester Stallone. Best acting/screenplay Oscar nominations in 1976, then went the action hero route for two decades, losing much respect, then vanished to straight-to-dvd releases by the early 2000s. Wrote/directed his way back in late aughts, building to an Oscar nomination for best supporting actor in 2016. Now he’s about to star in a TV series by the creator of “Yellowstone” and writer of The Sopranos, Boardwalk Empire, and Wolf of Wallstreet at age 75.
How about Kate Bush’s “Running Up that Hill” hitting the top of the charts this month due to its inclusion in “Stranger Things”? Though a great artist, her music hadn’t been on the radio in decades (in America, at least). Her music us being rediscovered by “the kids.”